It Never Rains but It Pours (or Floods!)
I found I'd rather help someone with their house than work on my own. Speaking of which; it seems I'd rather help someone else with their sins then work on my own.
True to form, I fell into serious sin like I usually do when I leave town. I should just put a big sign on my forehead "SINNER!" before I leave or have my Confessor on standby when I come back to town.
But, I'm still trying to help others to Heaven. Does that make what I did better? Does spending the weekend helping someone else justify that, for no good reason, I missed Mass last Sunday (that's not all I did but I'll leave it at that). No!
Helping others is worthy and an important part of being a Christian but it should not come at the expense of your own soul. I know this. I believe this. But, I don't live this.
Is the answer to never leave my house? Never talk to anyone? Never reach out? No, but when we reach out; when we extend ourselves we should be extending a Christ-like hand not Judas reaching out for the coins.
Please remember in prayer my Aunt. Her son is gravely ill. We don't know what is wrong. She had to fly suddenly to Florida this week to be with him in the hospital.
Some days I don't think I will live past tomorrow. I don't mean literally; I mean spiritually. I'm in a spiritual dead zone right now.
For all the joshing I do with Terry he's always one of the first ones to know something is wrong with me and extend a hand. He makes me laugh. It is all appreciated. His prayers are most appreciated.
All of your prayers are appreciated. Thank you.
I'm feeling maudlin. Maybe it's that another birthday is approaching and I feel, frequently, useless.
I need to pick myself up from that kitchen floor. I am useful. We all are useful. Useful to Him, useful to others, useful to ourselves. If I give up and lie there; is that how I want to spend eternity; in a Hell of scraping linoleum that is never clean with a soul that is always dirty?