February 03, 2007

Cathy's Dream

Yesterday evening, I was invited by some of my old party buddies to "Stupor Bowl". Their annual event of biking around N.E. Minneapolis and barhopping until you get completely wasted. I declined. My days of that kind of thing are DONE.

Last night, I had the strangest dream.....


Come Catholics, Come One, and All: 3 Days of Mass and Music, Sabine Farm, Wisconsin ,Friday-Sunday.

Thursday:
Tent and stage set-up begins. Father Z looks out his kitchen window and sees some Catholics sneaking across the lawn trying to set up their personal tents early. He walks out and reminds them no one can start camping until tomorrow. They leave, smiling, no problem, they will come back tomorrow.

Friday: The first campers arrive (including the crew that tried to sneak in early). Relevant Radio of Green Bay sets up a temporary broadcast tower. The Morning Program and Drew Mariani broadcast live on site.

Marathon County, Wisconsin sherrif's department reports absolutely no problems.

The Eucharist Adoration tent sets up a Perpetual Adoration schedule. EVERYONE signs up for at least one hour.

The Confession tent reports lines 1/2 mile long. The first "customers" are the crew that tried to set up camp early.

The Chapel alternates Novus Ordo and Tridentine evening Mass. All are ad orientem and Latin. Father Z is overwhelmed with requests from men who want to be altar servers. He informs the lay men they will not be needed because a record number of Deacons and Brothers have shown up.

The delegation from Minnesota arrives with several bloggers and priests from the Archdiocese of St. Paul/Minneapolis. Faithmouse sets up a booth with his drawings. Ray checks his blood pressure. Geometricus gets a fire going. Adoro and I get the hotdish and coffee started. The Hadleybloggers amble over to check the music schedule. Terry Nelson takes a nap. Bearing Blog is trying to find her kids. In all the excitement, they realize no one remembered to set up their tents.

Adoro and I are beside ourselves to finally meet blogging sisters Happy Catholic, Angela Messenger and Christine Schult. We recruit them to help set up the Minnesota tents.

Friday night's headliner: Benedictine Monks of St. Domingo de Silos from Spain.

Saturday: The Friday evening national news had aerial shots of the gathering. More Catholics start arriving.

The U.K. delegation of priests and bloggers arrives. Fr. Whinder is besieged with photo and autograph requests. Father Z is REALLY happy to see more clergy. Father Z very tired.

Morning Masses in the Chapel and Morning Prayers.

There is a minor complaint that the Benedictine Monks of St. Domingo de Silos were chanting all night and no one could sleep. It is collectively decided to just "offer it up"

A second tent for Eucharistic Adoration is set up. The first tent is not big enough to hold all the people who want to Adore Him.

A group of Cistercian nuns from the Valley of Our Lady Monastery receive permission to attend and they set up a schedule for Rosary recitation under the Marian statue that they brought. So many people want to participate, that Priests for Life bring a Marian statue of their own and set up a second station dedicated to Rosary's for Life.

Noon Angelus is so loud that a noise complaint is received from MILWAUKEE!

Another Confession tent (the 3rd one) is set up. Fr. Fox from Ohio arrives. Fr. Z is REALLY happy to see more clergy. Father Z very tired, but praising God!

More Masses are scheduled for the Chapel because there are so many people.

EWTN arrives. Raymond Arroyo starts around the clock coverage. To everyone's amazement Mother Angelica is with the EWTN group. She does a live segment of Mother Angelica Live featuring attendees.

Lino Rulli of Sirius Catholic Channel arrives. He hooks up with his Minnesota buddies. Announces he will host: "Linguini with Lino" that evening. Everyone's really happy to hear that since very few actually brought food. They must have been hoping for some kind of Loaves and Fishes event.

Geometricus and I contact some of their Native American relatives and start netting fish in local lakes to help feed the multitude. Fr. Z raids his wine cellar. Fr. Z blesses the boats and amazingly they don't sink! The nets are full to bursting. Local sportsman do NOT complain about the netting.

The Ragemonkeys arrive from the Sooner state with Fr. Powell of Texas. Fr. Hamilton accidently hit a deer and has it on the top of the car. Inexplicably, Fr. Tharp is wearing a Batman cape over his clericals.

Fr. Francis Mary Stone and Fr. John Corapi are engaged in a really competitive game of HORSE on the basketball court.

The Color My Veil tent, where you select the best color for your chapel veil based upon your skin tone, is really popular with the Catholic women. A minor fracus ensues when Terry Nelson tries to enter.

Universal joy ensues when blogger John Paul Sonnen of Orbis Catholicus arrives bearing a message from the Holy Father in Rome. Mr. Sonnen reads it over a loudspeaker. The Holy Father offers his blessing on all in attendance.

There is a rumor that a wrestling match between Fr John "Zorro" Zuhlsdorf and Bishop Donald "The Chair" Trautman over ICEL translations is scheduled. Or, maybe that's just wishful thinking.

The Blogging tent collapses but no one is hurt. Too many bloggers want to update their pages. Networks around the world are jammed.

The West Coast delegation, led by Gerald Augustinus and his wife Dr. Erin, finally arrive-fashionably late.

Saturday night's headliner: Anonymous 4

Sunday:Masses begin at 4:00 a.m. People are encouraged to consider the fact that not everyone is going to fit in the Chapel at 10 a.m. and to plan accordingly.

The Adoration tent is temporarily closed until all the morning Masses are completed. Rosary devotions are still going strong. A Benediction is planned at 1:00 just before Adoration will reopen.

Priests that have heard Confession are amazed at the numbers participating.

A delegation of "Rainbow Catholics" and "Womenpriests" show up and try to get in. Fr. Z points them to the Confession and Catechism tents. They refuse and set up across the road. Gradually, they feel alone and are overwhelmed with the Spirit. They cross the road, go to Confession, buy a Catechism and decide to be celibate and abandon their hubris. They run around Praising God!

Monk gets on the loudspeaker and warns everyone not to take the red headphones in the Catholic Music tent. Apparently, someone snuck some Nickelback recordings in. Monk says: "It's your trip, but I'm just warning you"

The headliner: Twin Cities Catholic Chorale under the direction of Monsignor Richard J. Schuler. Monsignor in typical fashion rallies from his sick bed and says "He will not miss this glorious opportunity to expose more Catholics to the great history and beauty of music in our Church"

People start going home Praising God. In a fine example of the power of Catholic prayer, the Mass and the Rosary, abortion is outlawed worldwide and no one protests!

The Sabine Farm is left in immaculate condition. Father Z sleeps for 3 days.

Then I woke up and it was all over...or was it?

9 Comments:

Blogger Ray from MN said...

We're going to have to switch blog providers, Cathy, so I can being sending regular LJs over to you.

That must have taken a week to write! Wonderful!

The I.C., Curt Jester and Sister Mary Martha better watch out. I'm switching Catholic Blog Award contest categories for you now!

February 03, 2007 1:06 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

ROFL!

I'm sure I'd be doing more than setting up hotdish! I find that kind of thing to be boring, but would do it if necessary! Most likely I'd be tangled up in a tent rope somewhere, screaming about spiders, and asking if anyone had seen my dog?

:-P

~ Adoro

February 03, 2007 2:29 PM  
Blogger Cathy_of_Alex said...

Adoro: LMAO! Well, it was a dream so who knows, perhaps you were doing all those things out of my "line of sight"

Ray: Curt Jester and I.C. are definitely funnier then I am.

February 03, 2007 3:26 PM  
Blogger Angela Messenger said...

Cathy - I laughed till I cried when I read this! I am linking on my blog to it!

I only wish 3 more things had happened...apparition of the Blessed Mother, visit by Papa Benny and the Second Coming LOL!

PS - Adoro, I saw your dog checking out this black and white cat over by the bushes...or was it a skunk?!

February 03, 2007 5:08 PM  
Blogger Adoro Te Devote said...

Angela, if it was a skunk, I wouldn't have to ask where she was! LOL

But if there are geese around, she'd be doing a great job of keeping them at bay, preserving us all from their...uh..."results".

:-)

My greyhound would be napping in a tent somewhere, just like his ancestors 2,000 years ago.

February 03, 2007 7:43 PM  
Blogger Cathy_of_Alex said...

Angela: Perhaps my next halluc er, dream will have all those events!

February 03, 2007 8:27 PM  
Blogger Angela Messenger said...

Cathy - I look forward to Part 2!

February 03, 2007 9:14 PM  
Blogger Georgette said...

That's a great dream, Cathy!! It had me in stitches!

Too bad there are no real Cath-blog-fests like that--yet! Actually, it reminded me a little bit of Catholic Familyland's Family Fest that they have each year, so maybe it will happen! I'll have to make a special trip in to the States for that!

February 05, 2007 10:47 AM  
Blogger Cathy_of_Alex said...

georgette: I miss you. If there was a blog award category for Most Missed Blog, I'd vote for you.

February 05, 2007 1:11 PM  

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